The Right Spot

Friday, October 31, 2003

save the gay baby wales!

thanks Neo for this hysterical link. It left me in fits of laughter!

Funny Shit

come see my spooky grrls!

My Spooky Grrls!

halloween has been a blast! :)

check out the big brain on rightmama!

YAY me i can have comments now! So say somethin!!! ;)

Happy Halloween!

Hello ghosts and goblins!! I love Halloween, and to celebrate I have collected pictures of my girls in their costumes over the years!

Click here for Past Halloween Pictures!

hall1998.jpg - Mikayla, almost 2 as a ballerina
hall1999.jpg - Mikayla, almost 3 as a butterfly princess
hall1999FirstPumpkin - the girls first carved Pumpkin
hall2000.jpg - Harley, 1 1/2 as an M&M, Mikayla, almost 4 as a belly dancer
hall2001.jpg - Harley, 2 1/2 and Mikayla almost 5, both Diamondbacks Cheerleaders - costumes made be me :)
hall2001Mikayla.jpg - close up of Mikayla as Dbacks girl
hall2001harley.jpg - closeup of Harley as Dbacks girl
hall2002Harley.jpg - Harley. 3 1/2 as a Butterfly
hall2002Mikayla.jpg - Mikayla almost 6 as a Butterfly

I dont have any pictures yet for this year, but i should have some posted tonight or tommorrow. Mikayla (almost 7) will be a witch and Harley ( 4 1/2) will be a kitty.

Thursday, October 30, 2003

Bring Back The Porn!

On "scrubs" the main dr guy just said the funniest thing... now, its not verbatum, but i did my best ;)

"If they took all the porn off the internet there would only be one website left, and that would be bringbacktheporn.com"

_____________
edited to add : Hey ya freaky googlers, Keith, over at Berrysworld, is more specific about this quote!
Thanks for the comments guys! :)

huh?

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,101712,00.html

Halloween Costume Sparks Capitol Hill Scare

Thursday, October 30, 2003


WASHINGTON — The House of Representatives (search) shut down Thursday following a reported security breach at a nearby congressional office building, but police later determined that a plastic revolver and Halloween costume were to blame and lawmakers went back in session.

U.S. Capitol Police Chief Terrance Gainer (search) said "two staff members bringing in Halloween costumes" were responsible. "I don't think they had any ill intent," he said, adding he expected no charges to be filed.

Start to finish, the incident lasted two hours or less -- but it triggered a massive security response in a time of terrorism worries. Police in battle gear moved into the Cannon House Office Building (search) in pursuit of suspects.

Gainer said the two female staff aides had stopped to chat with security personnel after placing a bag on a security station X-ray belt at the entrance to the office building, then went into their building. Moments later, security officials noticed the image of a gun on a video screen, and triggered an alarm.

The security personnel performed "well within standards" and the two staff aides were "very sorry all this happened," Gainer said.

The incident triggered memories of a lethal incident on July 24, 1998, when a man with a history of mental illness rushed into the Capitol and killed two security guards. The accused shooter, Russell E. Weston Jr., is awaiting trial.

Rep. John Shimkus, R-Ill., contacted Capitol police to report that his aides were the two people authorities were looking for. Security personnel raced to the office and learned about the costume and toy gun. Shimkus' office would not identify the two aides and no charges were filed.

"I don't think anybody was trying to trick anybody," Gainer said. "I think it was just an unusual set of Halloween circumstances that unfolded on us."

Shimkus said the staff members didn't realize they were the suspects until Capitol police said they were looking for a woman.

"This was an unfortunate misunderstanding, a result of my staff's efforts to put together a Halloween costume during their lunch hour," he said in a written apology.
______________________________

So, what happened to the guy grabbing the bag and running? Did that not happen?

Police Search for Gunman on Capitol Hill

This kind of shit scares me.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,101712,00.html

WASHINGTON — Police were looking for a man with a gun inside one of the office buildings on Capitol Hill, authorities said Thursday.

The Cannon House Office Building, located on the House side of the domed Capitol Building, was in lockdown mode and people were being evacuated while security personnel searched for him. The building houses many House representatives' offices, as well as committee rooms.

Apparently the suspect approached a police checkpoint at the building, set a backpack down and police detected a gun inside the bag. When the suspect realized the gun had been discovered, he grabbed the bag and ran into the building. Visitors to the buildings must go through metal detectors upon entering.

Police are looking for a 140-pound man wearing black pants, a jacket and a white shirt. He is carrying a black and gray book bag and may be armed with a .38-caliber handgun with a white handle.

Police are going door to door inside the building looking for the man. They have orders to take the gunman down if necessary.

Fox News' Jim Mills and Brian Wilson contributed to this report.

 

my little comedian

here is a joke my 4 yr old just told me. i think she got confused ;)

harley : knock knock
me : whos there?
harley : chicken
me : chicken who?
harley : he had to get to the other side!

hehehehe :) ahhh, the innocence of children :)

aint too bad thursday!

my sweet little almost 7 yr old woke up this morning with a fever, so we are home today. My paycheck is so gonna suck, but whatever! ;)

if i hadnt been home i would have missed the new carpet guy who came today. the other night they tore up the wet pad underneath the carpet and today's job was to lay down a new pad under the now dry carpet. today's guy was actually the owner. a better-than-cute 30 yr old single guy who could actually carry on a conversation than didnt consist of who won the latest NASCAR race or how many people who knows named "Bubba". if i could have locked him in a cage and kept him here for intelligent conversation (and eye candy), i would have ;) i think he is the first man ive talked to in a long time, with the exception of my ex, who could hold my interest in a conversation.

yes im flighty, yes im shallow. but im also an intelligent woman who likes to discuss current events, tv shows, movies and mostly politics. i think im really not the norm.. i feel like im in some kind of middle class of personalities. you have the intelligent geeky chicks, intelligent artsy chicks, intelligent political chicks... then you have the dumb ones, the flirty ones, the ones who dont care whats going on as long as their hair looks good. Im in between. Im smart... i like to have intelligent conversation. But im also friendly and outgoing and.. well... flirty. Just ask my ex lol! Im NOT artsy.. im NOT geeky. And as much as id LOVE to be, im not as political and the uberpolitic chicks. I guess Im just ... me. And i love to talk to people who find it acceptable for me to just be ... me.

Well, luckily my daughter's fever is gone now. She's weird that way, she gets these 1 day fevers about once every 4-6 weeks. We have my niece's birthday today, a Halloween party tommorrow and trick or treating tommorrow night... then another nirthday party saturday morning and another Halloween Party saturday night. Im sure I will find time to blog tho.. :)

Hey, if you're reading this.. how about a link back in your blogroll? Ill be glad to reciprocate! :)

Tuesday, October 28, 2003

yeehaw!

A Cowboy Story

A modern day cowboy has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His horse has already died of thirst.

He's crawling through the sand,certain that he has breathed his last, when all of a sudden, he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him.

He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old brief case.

He opens it and out pops a genie. But this is no ordinary genie.

She is wearing an Internal Revenue Service ID badge and a dull gray dress.

There's a calculator in her pocketbook. She has a pencil tucked behind one ear.

Well, cowboy," says the genie... "You know how I work. You have three wishes."

I'm not falling for this." Says the man. "I'm not going to trust an IRS
auditor genie."

What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like
you're a goner anyway!"

The man thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right.

OK, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink."

***POOF***

The cowboy finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen, and he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies.

OK, cowpoke, what's your second wish."

My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams."

***POOF***

The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems.

"OK, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!"

After thinking for a few minutes, the man says.. "I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me."

***POOF***

He is turned into a tampon.

The moral of the story:

If the government offers you anything, there's going to be a string attached.

camping out in the livingroom

tonight i will be camping out in the livingroom, anxious for my favorite show *ever* to begin! ladies and gentlemen, dont miss 24 tonight! This season looks like a good one. So far, my favorite was the first season. It had more shock and anxiety. I have a feeling this season will beat all :)

Monday, October 27, 2003

ROFL!!

I got this in email today.. kind of tacky but im ROFL! ;)

water everywhere

this is just what i f'ing need today!

I had a maintenance guy out here the other day fixing the hot water thingie for my washing machine (it was leaking). He left, saying it was good to go. So today i go in and start a load of laundry on HOT. I walk away, tending to the 3 children (my 2 plus a neighbors kid i watch after school). About 30 minutes later i come back to switch the clothes to the dryer and there is water *EVERYWHERE*. I am not exxagerating, i have at least an INCH of water in my utility room (large room!!), and the entire dining room carpet is soaked. I called the office and the same assclown of a maintenance man came over and is having a carpet cleaning service come suck up the water.

this is just bleeping terrific. all of my ex's boxes were in that room (YES NEO ALL YOUR STUFF) so i had to drag all those boxes out so his stuff wouldnt be ruined/damaged. luckily my christmas stuff was on top so thats okay. im just so frustrated now. its been a frustrating day. and to top it off my almost 7 yr old is stomping around telling me how nobody loves her and everyone hates her. i dont know where she is getting this or why she is saying it, but its killing me - everytime. i comfort and console her and re-enforce my unconditional love, but she is hurting and its killin me. :(

well, carpet guys are here - he said he will do my livingroom floor for free - yay for (good looking!) carpet cleaners!

Sunday, October 26, 2003

check this chick out!

I got this link from a message board i post on. This woman rocks! Reading her site makes me wanna be her friend. She seems so talented and creative! I love her story/costume of T'Leo! Maybe next year Ill borrow her idea and create my own Vulcan identity :) Ill have to start thinking of a good name!

the teacher in me

it is a rainy sunday afternoon here in Middle Tennessee so the girls and I have spent the day inside. I teach pre-k and spend a great deal of time working with my children at home on reading, writing, etc. I ordered some awsome (and totally free!) books from www.starfall.com for my classroom, and kept some at home for my girls' use. Mikayla, almost 7 yrs old and in the 1st grade, uses the Level 1 book at her school! At home, she prefers Level 2. She is a very intelligent girl, more on her in a moment... Harley, 4 yrs and in Pre-K, spends most of her book time copying words and numbers from the Level 1 book.

Mikayla really blows my mind. Her intelligence is almost intimidating. One of her favorite activities is to sit at the table with a stack of blank paper & markers/crayons/pencils and writer her own stories. She has written several stories, usually 5-8 pages long, including appropriate pictures on every page.

For some reason im having trouble concentrating to finish this entry! I had big plans to talk about working with your children at home, along with links and book suggestions. I guess Ill just mention "Teach your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons". this is a fabulous book, for homeschoolers or parents who are looking for a great book to use with their children.

Maybe ill come back later when my mind isnt racing and edit this to make more sense :)

Saturday, October 25, 2003

talk to me!

if you're readin my blog and wanna talk to rightmama

email : rightmama AT macmail DOT com
AIM : rightmama1

:)

halloween rocks!

i love halloween, especially now that i have kids old enough to appreciate it :)

tonight my girls and i (and sisters & cousins) went to a halloween festival in our little town. it was totally free, which rocked too! ;) they had a haunted house and trick or treating and games and a haunted hayride. we waited in line 1 1/2 hours for that hayride! mikayla cried, harley laughed ;) afterwards, mikayla tells me "im never going on anything scary ever again!!" harley says "lets do it again mom!!"

lots of fun!! :)

12 things to hate about me

12 things you always wanted to know about rightmama!

*im conservative and have been for as long as i can remember.

*i love a good thunderstorm. during tornado season, i love to watch the Storm Alerts on TV. I love it even more when the storm is right on top of me, but i still have power!

*My fave pet is a kitty. I like a flea-free kitty who likes to sleep on me :)

*My ambition in life really is to just be a stay at home mom.

*My *dream* in life is to be a wealthy stay at home mom, drive a fancy SUV and be able to spend as much money as i want shopping :) I guess id need a husband too. Id like another baby as well. And a maid ... and a cook!!

*I love to shop. When im feeling down, shopping picks me up. If i dont have any extra money to spend I go to walmart and put something on layaway.

*i dont want to be divorced. i dont want to be an ex wife.

*i came dangerously close to being a widow 15 months ago, and i cant get a grip on that or let it go. and whats even more pitiful is that it doesnt matter now, because we're getting a divorce.

*i dont really know who i am.

*im a shallow, critical person.

*im a stubborn optimist. while this sounds good in theory, it has caused me a great deal of pain. i have trouble letting shit go.

*i never knew the word "shit" wasnt in my spell checker ;)

2 of my favorite pictures :)

i love to take pictures, mostly of my girls. i have an awsome digital camera and i use it *often*. Ive never taken any photography classes but i think its something i would really enjoy.

Here are 2 of my favorite pictures.

This is Mikayla, taken earlier this week. She is a very photogenic child and loves to have her picture taken most of the time.


This picture is of my daughter Harley. It was taken Easter '02. Harley is also quite photogenic. Im not sure what it is about this picture that i love so much. Im just really drawn to it :)

this is funny :)

Friday, October 24, 2003

kitties

since im on the pet theme tonight, heres our 2 prior pets!

Mr Graycie... this was Harley's kitty, she begged her Daddy for a kitty for her 4th birthday. Sadly, we had to give graycie up when the girls & i moved into a new apt. graycie is now, very happily, residing at my sister's house. He is so much happier now with a big house and yard to run!


Autumn, Mikayla's kitty - this was our first "family pet". A gift from Santa :) Autumn was a bitch, but i loved her. We really bonded. When my (ex) husband was in the ICU last summer she would sleep on my arm like a baby, like she knew i needed the comfort. When we moved to TN from AZ I had to take her back to the Friends for Life people we bought her from. I was *devastated*. I did keep in touch with them tho, and Autumn was adopted by a loving family a few days after i brought her back

funny bunny

bunny is still nameless. the girls have come up with several ideas, but nothing firm.

Autumn (our first kitty's name)
Fall (lol)
George ("like W Bush?" "No Mom, like the Monkey!")
Sneaky (beanie kitty's name)
Sugar (short for the original Brown Sugar, which they apparently no longer like)

And my youngest, dissappointed that bunny is a boy, has decided she is going to pretend he is a girl.

Im just gonna keep calling him Bunny.

Friday 5!

There isnt a friday five up today so im using past questions :)

1. What vehicle do you drive? 1998 Dodge Neon

2. How long have you had it? 2 years

3. What is the coolest feature on your vehicle? its mine ;) it doesnt really have any features.

4. What is the most annoying thing about your vehicle? the dents!!

5. If money were no object, what vehicle would you be driving right now? a luxurious SUV!!

Thursday, October 23, 2003

racist conservative bastard!

Neo thinks we should name our sweet little bunny "Darkie" so when we come home we can say "DID YOU PUT DARKIE AWAY?" ROFLOL!

So what do ya think?

Does he look like a "Darkie" to you?
The girls wanna call him Brown Sugar ;)

Good One!

Many big juicy thanks to Neo for this little knee slapper, courtesy of Jokeloft.

Impromptu English Test
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence.
He pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now."
The mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senior, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!"
The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use 3 english words in a sentence".
The Mexican man of course agrees.
The Border Patrol Agent tells him, "The 3 words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in 1 sentence."
The Mexican man thinks really hard for about 2 minutes, then says, "Hmmm, Ok. The phone, it went Green, Green, Green, I Pink it up and sez Yellow?"

awwwww!

today little bit and i accompanied my oldest daughter and her class on a field trip to a Pumpkin Farm. After a hayride, corn field maze, petting zone, etc we got to go into a "bunny run" which consisted of about a dozen or so little bunnies. the kids got to pick up the bunnies and pet them. I saw a sign, Bunnies 8.00!" Of course my reading child noticed it right away lol! So we are the proud new owners of a precious little Lynx colored Rex Rabbit!

I dont have a pic right now, but he is really cute. I think his name is Brown Sugar, but ive just been calling him Bunny ;)

Monday, October 20, 2003

source

the (ex) husband informs me i need to give me joke source!

all of them so far except "i need aresnic" came from jokes.com :)

this will make ya cross your legs!

Radical Procedure

Joe was moderately successful in his career, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. When his personal hygiene and love life started to suffer, he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across a doctor who solved the problem.

"The good news is I can cure your headaches... The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine. The pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."

Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he has anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.

When he left the hospital, his mind was clear, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He walked past a men's clothing store and thought, "That's what I need: a new suit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit."

The salesman eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see... size 44 long." Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?"

"It's my job."

Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure..."

The salesman eyed Joe and said, "Let's see... 34 sleeve and... 16 and a half neck" Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?"

"It's my job."

Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" Joe was on a roll and said, "Sure..."

The salesman eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see... 9-1/2... E." Joe was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?"

"It's my job."

Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about a new hat?" Without hesitating, Joe said, "Sure..."

The salesman eyed Joe's head and said, "Let's see... 7-5/8." Joe was incredulous, "That's right, how did you know?"

"It's my job."

The hat fit perfectly. Joe was feeling great, when the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure..." The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see... size 36."

Joe laughed, "No, I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old."

The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. It would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."

another funny!



The Model Lodger

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years and decided to raise some extra cash by advertising for a lodger in their terrace house.

After a few days, a young attractive woman applied for the room and explained that she was a model working in a near-by city center studio for a few weeks and that she would like the room from Mondays to Thursdays, but would pay for the whole week.

Doris showed her the house and they agreed to start straight away.

"There's just one problem," explained the model. "Because of my job, I have to have a bath every night, and I notice you don't have a bath."

"That's not a problem," replied Doris. "We have a tin bath out in the yard and we bring it into the living room in front of the fire and fill it with hot water."

"What about your husband? asked the model.

"Oh, he plays darts most weekdays, so he will be out in the evenings," replied Doris.

"Good," said the model. "Now that that's been settled, I'll go to the studio and see you tonight."

That evening, Fred dutifully went to his darts match while Doris prepared the bath for the model. After stripping off, the model stepped into the bath. Doris was amazed to see that she had no pubic hair.

The model noticed Doris' staring eyes, so she smiled and explained that it is part of her job to shave herself, especially when modeling swimmer or underclothes.

Later when Fred returned, Doris related this oddity and he does not believe her.

"It's true, I tell you!" said Doris. "Look, if you don't believe me, tomorrow night I'll leave the curtains slightly open and you can peek in and see for yourself."

The next night, Fred left as usual and Doris prepared the bath for the model. As the model stepped naked into the bath, Doris stood behind her.

Doris looked towards the curtains and pointed towards the model's naked pubic area. Then she lifted up her skirt and wearing no panties, pointed to her own hairy mass.

Later Fred returned and they retired to bed.

"Well, do you believe me now?" she asked Fred. "Yes, he replied. "I've never seen anything like it in my life. But why did you lift up your skirt and show yourself?"

"Just to show you the difference," answered Doris. "But I guess you've seen me millions of times."

"Yes, said Fred, I have - but the rest of the dart team hadn't."

i need arsenic!

a woman walks into a pharmacy
she rushes to the counter and tells the pharmacist
"i need some arsenic, i want to kill my husband"
the pharmacist replies "i cant give you arsenic without a prescription"
the woman repeats herself ... "i need some arsenic, i want to kill my husband"
the pharamcist repeats hisself "i cant give you arsenic without a prescription"
the woman, frustrated, grabs a photo out of her purse, slams it on the counter, and says "i need some arsenic, i want to kill my CHEATING husband"
the pharmacist looks at the photo and sees another man with his wife and says "I didnt realise you had a prescription!"

okay this joke cracked me up. got a funny joke? email me

rightmama AT macmail DOT com

and if it makes me laugh ill post it :) I like good dirty jokes too, hint hint ;)

ring ring

i bought a new cell phone over the weekend. a phantom kyocera. it rocks.. im lovin it (like mcdonalds lol)

id love a ring that sounds like the phones at CTU on 24. 24 is my all time *favorite* show. Jack is the man ;) I have October 28 marked on my calender!

not tonight, i have a headache

i have had the worst headache today...it hurts so bad i dont think i feel up to fooling around with BOB. He is awfully "turned on" by me ;) Just a quick twist of my wrist and he is ready to go!

So im poppin a few tylenol.. maybe bob will get lucky after all :)

Thursday, October 09, 2003

i need a man

BOB is nice and all, but lets face it - all he does is lay there and vibrate. i need a man who is strong enough to unscrew the damn training wheel on my daughter's bike that is too tight for me. And who can hook up the freakin digital cable so that the VCR works.

Earlier today my 4 yr old turns on the TV and it was "broken". I messed with it and the digital cable wasnt working. So, me thinking im all hot and shit, start messing with it. Well, i figure out ther regular cable is FINE, but the digital is not working. So i call the cable company and she reset my box, and says Okay plug it in.

Well for crying out loud.. easier said than done apparently. I sat there messing with cables for an HOUR, i kid you not. I finally said fuck it and plugged the digital box into the TV, and THATS THAT. So the VCR isnt gonna work right now. Yeh, explain THAT to said 4 yr old who will just *die* if she cant watch one of her videos, when she wants!

I just realised I can hook up the VCR to the tv in my bedroom. Haha! I guess i *dont* need a man LOL!

my thoughts for the day

i really suck at tihs whole blogging thing. i mean to post, i have good intentions. but i just forget! So here are a few things ive been meaning to post about!

*Enterprise - oh, excuse me, Star Trek Enterprise. I love this show. I started watching it the first season because my (ex) husband watched it and I liked watching it with him. The song "wherever you will go" was on the original commercials, and that song came to mean alot to me.



anyway, after watching a few shows i quickly became addicted. i love it. my favorite character is tripp, not just for the eye candy... i love his accent too! ;) I like t'pol too. I think shes pretty and i like the way she talks as well.

my point in bringing up this show, i dont like the way they changed the theme song. i liked it better before.

*Arnold - i am loving the fact that he won the CA Recall! Almost enough to make me want to move to California LOL! Of course it would have to be a conservative area, that doesnt get too hot, isnt *too* crowded, with a reasonable cost of living but tons of great paying jobs and awsome schools. Oh and, if its not too much to ask, no earth quakes...

*Military couple who won the lottery - i say GOOD FOR THEM!! If it cant be me or someone i love, then im glad its someone like them!

*Conservative Episcopalians - i think they should separate from the liberals... might as well just be Catholic tho ;)

*And the big news of the day.. RightMama is gonna get a concealed weapons permit. Soon ill be a "gun totin, tightassed, right wing conservative" ;) (thats what some liberal jackass called me) What can i say... except im NOT a tightass, and thats all i have to say about that ;)